Mentoring Men for the Master

WHAT DOES THE CHRISTIAN HOME LOOK LIKE?

The American home is in serious trouble today.  Why is this true?  It is not because most average homes are saturated in alcohol.  It is not because the average home is plagued with immorality.  It is true because the average home is indifferent to Jesus Christ and the spiritual values related thereto which make a Christian home.  The home has become basically a secular institution where the physical needs of human beings are being met while the spiritual needs are being ignored.  Malachi 2:15 says that God established  the home and placed it in the world that it might preserve a godly seed, that is, it is God’s purpose that children in the home be won to Jesus Christ and be trained in His way of life in the home.  The home is miserably failing in this God-given responsibility.

The finest and most comprehensive passage in the Bible on the Christian home is found in Ephesians 5:22-31; 6:1-4.  In this passage the apostle Paul shows that the Christian home is constructed upon two great foundational principles.

  1. The Christian Home Must Be Unconditionally Committed to The Ways of God. Paul does not think of the home as being basically a sociological institution.  He thinks of it as being a God-given institution, and the God who gave it to man must maintain and sustain it.  Therefore, throughout this great section on the home Paul pre-supposes that the members must be committed to three things at least:
    1. They Must Be Committed to Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord. He assumes that wives are born again persons; for he says, “submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”  He assumes the husbands know Christ; for he commands that they love their wives, even as Christ loved the church.  He also appeals to the children as Christians, saying, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord; for this is right.”  Jesus said, “Without Me ye can do nothing,” and Paul is applying this great truth in the realm of the home.  He is saying that one can perform his Christian responsibilities in the home, only if he is born again and has the power of Christ in his life.
    2. They Must Be Committed to The Church of Jesus Christ. Paul speaks of the church in great and glorious terms.  Paul never thought of a Christian home that was not faithfully connected with a New Testament church.  Some ask, “Must I attend all the meetings of the church?  I need a little time at home with my family.”  “No, you do not have to attend all the meetings, but you had better be dead sure that your children know the church comes before your pleasure, your social meetings, and that it is a must on Sunday rather than your desecration of the Lord’s day.”
    3. They Must Also Be Committed to The Bible. Paul quoted the Bible in establishing the truth about the home.  When he told the wife to be subject to her husband, he was but restating the very Word of God in Gen. 3:16, “Thy desire shall be to thy husband, he shall rule over thee.”  When he spoke to the children, he quoted the fifth commandment of the law.  Every problem with which the home is cursed can be traced back to a departure from the Bible.  The Bible declares that the home is primarily a spiritual unit, but modern man has made it only a physical, secular institution.  The Bible declares that the home must be disciplined, but modern man says little children must not be punished.  The Bible declares that the father is the head of the home, but modern parents have let it drift without any sure direction.

I ask you, is your home committed to Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord?  Is it committed to the church of Jesus Christ?  Is it committed to the way of the Bible?  A Christian home must be committed to these things of the Lord.

  1. The Christian Home Must Be Obedient to The Word of The Lord. In his message to the home, Paul speaks a very personal word to every person who comprises the family circle:
    1. First, He Addresses The Wife. “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” (v.22). He is not saying that the husband is God.  His not giving the husband permission to be a tyrant or a dictator or to abuse his family and children.  But he is declaring that in the government of God the husband is the head of the home.  Therefore, the wife is to recognize his leadership and guidance and discipline in the home.   When she does this, she is a wise wife, and she is obeying the Word of God.  I believe the amplified New Testament has the correct translation of Paul’s command.  It says, “Wives, be subject …to your own husbands as a service to the Lord.”  There is no thought of the husband having the prerogative to rule with a rod of iron or impose his selfish will, without thought of wife.  Rather the wife is subject to one who is subject to Jesus Christ and who presides over his home in love and dignity for the welfare of the entire household.
    2. Secondly, Paul Addresses The Husband. “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for it.” (v. 25).  This is the steepest command God ever lays upon the heart of a human being in the Bible.  If the wife thinks her role is difficult, let her ponder this word to the Husband.  How did Christ love the church?
      1. He loved the church unselfishly. He never thought of Himself. He thought only of His church.
      2. He loved the church without reservation. There were many faults with the church, but that did not diminish His love.
      3. He loved the church sacrificially. Did He not go to the cross for His church? “He gave Himself for it.”
      4. He loved the church Conceivably Christ could have sent His word of concern to the church from heaven.  He could have pleaded that He had given it many material benefits.  But He did not do that.  He bestowed Himself upon the church.

It is this kind of love which Paul says the husband should have for his wife:

  1. The husband should love his wife
  2. The husband should love his wife without reservation.
  3. The husband should love his wife sacrificially.
  4. The husband should love his wife personall

Paul goes on to say, “So ought men to love their wives as their own body.  He that loveth his wife loveth himself.” (v. 28).  This is the best description  of absolute love on earth.  Our love for ourselves is absolute.  The same absoluteness should mark our love for our wives.  It sounds selfish in a way, but to take care of one’s wife is to take care of one’s self.

  1. Finally, Paul Turns And Speaks A Word to The Children in The Home. He emphasizes two words:
    1. Obey
    2. Honor
      1. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord; for this is right.”  Philips Translation, “Obey your parents as those whom the Lord has set over you.”  It is right because God has ordained it for the good of children, the parents, the Christian home, and the preservation of society.

“Honor thy father and mother…that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.”  The word honor is the word timao, which means to give a  person the respect and reverence which is due him.  “Obedience is the duty; honor is the disposition of which the obedience is born.” [1]  A child who does not honor his parents as God-given and as the earth’s greatest blessing is headed for a fall.  It is doubtful that he must ever honor anyone or anything in his entire life.  The parent must recognize that he must lead a life that commands honor.  Parents which are honorable can expect to be obeyed.  Children who obey are wise indeed.  Children who do not are fight against God and are headed for destruction.

 

 

[1] Wuest, p. 136.