If you and I would understand the sacredness and purpose of marriage, we must go back to God’s original design set forth in Genesis 2:18-25.
GOD’S CREATIVE WORK was not complete until He made woman (Gen. 2:18). He could have made her from the dust of the ground, as He made man. God chose, however, to make her from the man’s flesh and bone. In so doing, He illustrated for us that in marriage, man and woman become “one flesh.” This is not a Siamese physical union, but a mystical union of the couple’s heart and lives. The marriage bond illustrates the relationship that exists between Christ and His church (Ephes. 5:22-32). If you are married or planning to be married, you should be willing to keep the commitment that makes the two of you one. The goal in marriage is far more than friendship. It should be a total oneness.
GOD GAVE MARRIAGE as a gift to Adam and Eve (Gen. 2:24). They were created perfect for each other. Marriage was not just for convenience, or sex, nor was it brought about by culture. It was instituted by God, who Himself officiated at the first marriage. The marriage covenant or commitment is succinctly but clearly stated in Genesis 2:24-25:
“For this cause a man will leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.” From these words you can see 4 components of the marriage covenant.
- There must be a LEAVING. That is, the couple make a public commitment of ultimate loyalty and lifelong devotion one to the other, above all others, even parents. Note: The parents must release their children to their mates, even as the children leave their parents.
- There must be a CLEAVING. That is, the couple must take responsibility for each other’s welfare by loving the mate above all others. This must be a permanent commitment of the will, not be based on feeling or emotion. No one should ever enter into marriage with any reservation about sticking it out, (“for better and for worse”) or any thought of divorce. Marriage is until “death do you part, not debt unto you part,” etc.
- There must be a WEAVING. That is, the couple is to “become” one flesh. “Become” indicates a process, not an instant achievement. The union may begin immediately in the sex act, but physical union only symbolizes the beginning of the union of souls, a spiritual and psychological intertwining of two persons. The first two years are often difficult, but the committed couple discovers how to “become” one increasingly, until their union becomes a wonderfully satisfying experience. “Quickie” marriage leads to “Quickie” expectations, which leads to “Quickie” divorce. Don’t fall for this satanic lie!
- There must be a RECEIVING. That is, the couple is to receive each other in total intimacy. “They were naked” (Laid Bare) in the Garden and were not embarrassed, the result being that there were no barriers of communication between them. But after Adam and Eve sinned, shame and awkwardness followed, creating barriers between themselves and God. We often experience the same barriers in marriage. Ideally, a husband and wife have no barriers, feeling no embarrassment in exposing themselves to each other and to God. But like Adam and Eve, we put on fig leaves (Gen. 3:7) because we have areas we don’t want our spouse or God to know. Then we hide just as Adam and Eve hid from God. In marriage, lack of spiritual, emotional, and intellectual intimacy usually precedes a breakdown of physical intimacy, and the latter often leads to separation and separation leads to divorce.
“Who is sufficient unto these things?” (2 Cor. 2:16). The answer of course is absolutely no human being. But God who created marriage made it to work and to all who will obey Him, He will pour out His all-sufficient grace.